Some Truths And Aids I Have Found Helpful as a Divorced Person by Rod Williams
- Every bottom has a trap door, and if I make the choice to open that trap door and let something other than Jesus fill that “God shaped hole”, I can always sink to a new low.
- Listen to expressive music: My favorite artist is Mandisa – What if we were Real, Overcomer and Out of the Dark. I often sang these songs as prayers through the pain, confusion an sense of being lost, like a child whose lost their parent eat a big amusement park.
- I enjoyed reading “Turn My Mourning Into Dancing” by Henri Nouwen. I credit Nouwen helping me invite God into my current situation, and learning to dance with the emotions, question, doubts etc. I even took a Zumba class during this time, and found it beneficial physical movements through music, that helped me with the emotional and spiritual movements I was going through as part of the divorce and fall out. Another book that helped me was Drop the Rock and deals with steps 6 & 7 of the AA program, but really touch on the 7 deadly sings, and how they affect my ability to live the life I want, and the relationships I have. If you are willing to look at how you can improve and participate in God’s sanctification process as part of your divorce recovery program, this was a very simple guide to addressing issues you may need to address moving forward with your new life.
- Do not isolate! Join a group that interests you or a support group, or both. Ask for prayer or go forward for prayer, if your church does not have this type of ministry after the service, and don’t be afraid to ask for help. Divorce recovery is not a do-it yourself program, just like our Christian faith isn’t. Got a hobby that gets you outside, like gardening, exercise or something else positive that interest you.
- Serve someone else. I regularly offered to take my niece for an afternoon or day, so my sister could have some time to do something around the house or get some much needed rest. I found taking my eyes off of myself and really seeing those around me in my family, friend and acquaintances and trying to create space in my schedule to regularly help out actually helped me.